Tag Archives: Final Rose

Bachelorette Des: And the winner is….

I didn’t think there was a way to come back from last week. Brooks had to come back because how – HOW? – could she profess her love for Drew or Chris after that fiasco where she told Brooks she loved him and cried for days?

But from the beginning my heart said Chris. How wonderful that she got past that infatuation to recognize the real affection and friendship she had with him from the beginning. Does she love him? Absolutely! Anyone watching the “After the Final Rose” episode could have seen it.

I breathed a sigh of relief when Brooks came out…her tears before he appeared had me worried, but after the initial shock you could see her relax. It was like something in her said, “Yes, I was right to choose Chris.”

Speaking of right – that proposal was gorgeous. I was nervous and mad when Chris H. indicated she was going to bring up the Brooks thing at the proposal. I was like, “You’re gonna blind side amazing Chris S. like that?” But he was eloquent and passionate. He was genuine and oh, oh, oh – the grow old and start a family stuff? Be still my heart.

I have no doubt that it was still hard for Chris S. to watch last week, but she did what most of us never get the chance to do! She chose real love. How many of us out there would have given Chris up to take the adrenaline feelings that Brooks gave her?

And the thing is – Chris gave her those too, she just couldn’t see it until Brooks stepped aside. I don’t see Brooks as any type of villain. I do think he hoped she would have stayed single. I think he regretted his choice just a little, but I honestly don’t think she regretted hers.

Watching the montage of her experiences with Chris you could see how special it was from the beginning. I think I was 100% (Chris’s fave words) sold when he asked her dad for her hand…her dad’s a slight geek, but Chris had something in common with him. They both loved Des with all their hearts.

I think this will last and I am absolutely happy with the outcome. I do feel bad for Drew, but can we say mature? I was so impressed with his responses to her when she let him go and then again on “ATFR”. He’s a gem, but I’m glad he’s not the next bachelor.

The next Bachelor? JUAN PABLO!!!! Had it been anyone else it would have been anti-climactic. He’s gonna be great – and really, he serves a purpose for the producers…they’ve been accused of not having diversity so a Latin lover can’t hurt.

There were times this season I was bored to death and I still think the editors and producers need to mix things up. It’s just a little too predictable episode-wise, if not outcome-wise. Still, I got that warm fuzzy feeling with Des and Chris just like with JP and Ashley…bet Des and Chris get married before Sean and Catherine!

Bring on Juan Pablo! Wish I was 25, I’d be at those additions in a heartbeat. Too bad I took German, though…

Bachelorette Des, Episode Two: Boys with “B” Names

Episode Two of the Bachelorette did not disappoint. Our first look at all of the guys in their everyday casual clothes revealed an amazing amount of hotness. It’s a frustrating group to figure out as a viewer because it seems like each guy gets cuter or uglier depending on the camera angle. I can’t get a handle on them, so I’ll have to wait and see their personalities! Which lucky for me that was the highlight of this show. We started to really see who some of these guys are.

The First One-on One: Brooks gets a rose.

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ABC.com Bachelorette Bios
The producer’s make sure we know that the guys of the house think Brooks is genuine by having Ben (the least liked guy – though we don’t know why yet, say so). Brooks is just a really chill guy. On their date he continuously calls her by her full name and he’s really, really cute in an indie, not hipster, way.

For their date they check out a wedding dress store, because surprise, she wants him to know that she seriously wants to design her own line of wedding dresses. She tell him to pick out a tux and we see his humor when he chooses a hideous green concoction. Brooks says silly is fun and he wants to really get to know her. He calls her beautiful because of her confidence

I’ll admit they look cute together. He picks her up and puts her in the Bentley and they drive around in their costumes, stopping for a cupcake at a truck where she gets mobbed by fans.

Their date has two more parts and both are romantic and we see a side of Brooks that let’s us know he’s a crazy good listener and able to open up! They drive to Hollywood sign where Des explains it’s the sign’s 90th anniversary. He gives her his jacket and they talk past relationships and taking chances on love. Brooks gets the first kiss he at sunset and it was very natural. He’d had his arm around her for a while and there was no awkwardness at all.

Later, driving in a shady looking area, she says she’s lost and she freaks him out a little with driving past the road closed signed. Viewers, however, know she’s got that practical joke side to her and it turns out to be an awesome dinner for two on a bridge that’s lit with a romantic purple glow.

At dinner we get to see he genuinely wants to know about her. There’s no agenda. She describes her parents relationship as the reason she hasn’t settled and asks about his family. His parents are divorced. He didn’t talk to his father from age 13-19 and is still working on that relationship. He’s learned not to take things for granted and to be grateful for what he has He almost cries as he’s telling her this but doesn’t. It’s just the right emotional tone.

Finally, she gives him the rose for his openness and vulnerability, and they go off to dance to Andy Grammer and his band. He says he’s “stoked” and the moments are only going to get more romantic.

I’m in love. The thing I like watching the two of them is that he listens to her, recaps – proving he heard her, and then makes a deduction that shows he wants to figure out more. It was a damn good first date, but this is the Bachelorette, does the 1st date guy ever win? This date feels different from other first dates. They aren’t gushing about each other or overwhelmed by the experience of a date on the show. They seemed to really connect on a chill, romantic, and friend level with room to grow.

Back at the house:
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ABC.com Bachelorette bios
We hear that Chris wants a date! But since we’re hearing this, we can be assured the cutie, normal, brown-haired boy of course won’t get put on group date. The scene plays out again with the next one-on-one. Disappointment. Then at the group date, we’re shown a snippet of her walking somewhere to talk with him and he’s saying how glad he is to get to talk with her. It’s looking good for him staying around a while…that’s producer editing for a sleeper top three boy…and I just intuitively like him so I’m hoping.

The group date is crazy: Ben gets the rose and a kiss.

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ABC.com Bachelorette bios
Soulja Boy leads the guys and Desiree through a video rap of “All the Right Reasons”. The only funny part was that they dressed some of the guys up like old Bachelors and it kind of felt like we were getting some foreshadowing and hints.

Brandon is sure he’ll pass any test, but it’s obvious he’s playing “guard and protect your heart” Kasey from Ally’s season. I wish they hadn’t made that connection because I liked Brandon and now I can’t see him without thinking of tattoo boy.

Ben’s in cowboy hat. Is this foreshadowing that he’s like Wes and there more for his career? It’s hard to think that when you’ve only heard about his little boy but later the guys talk about how he talks about his hopes that his business will expand because of the show.

James plays Justin, Ally’s guy that faked a broken leg and had a girlfriend. We’ve seen in the preview some convo where he ends up in tears and she looks miffed so that makes sense as well.

Michael G., the federal prosecutor who tried to fish her wishes out of the fountain played single dad Jason. Remember as a Bachelor Jason came in second…I doubt Michael will be the one but he’ll stick around. He tells her he’s got her back and will let her know about other guys.

Throughout the date she says she wants a man who can let loose and have a good time and at the group date night has a few moments worth mentioning besides all the guys ganging up on Ben.

Zack W. wanted time to show he was more than abs and brought her something from an antique shop. It’s a journal that’s never been written in with an inscription from a father to a daughter. SCORE! She’s impressed and he says don’t think of me as the clown. He blew her away with his depth.

We get a hilarious quote from Brandon regarding love that unfortunately comes off as too “Kaseyesque” He says love is like a butterfly…and he’s not gonna be the guy who squishes it. Then he goes and interrupts Drew who she was having a great conversation with to say he’s not ivy league, rich, , and doesn’t own his own business, but he’s a good guy. He tells her the story of his dad leaving, moving every two years as a child and his mom’s addiction. He basically raised his little brother and sister and can’t wait to have kids.

Desiree’s such a good person. She says she saw kindness in his heart, can tell he’s selfless, and has positive energy. My thing is if he’d just been a little more patient he’d have been more effective. He rushed all that information into a few minutes and came off a little crazy.

Ben steals Des from Mikey who runs and tattles that he got “swooped”. This starts off the whole Ben’s not here for the right reasons discussion with all the guys and Ben saying “what????” Ben honestly looks like he’s clueless as to why the guys dislike him. And as former bachelorette Ally F. tweeted, “What has he done?” Not much besides talk about his kid and kiss her.

Des asks if he misses Brody. He does but wants to know if she have questions. She says it doesn’t scare her. He said he wanted to kiss her earlier but thought the cowboy hat was gonna get in the way, so he asks to kiss her that night.

They’re setting up lot’s of tension between Mikey, James, Brandon and Ben.
Mikey wants to air frustrations – on a date???? Ben appreciates him approaching. Mikey says he gets a politician feel with him but wants to be friends. Ben assures him that he doesn’t want tension and says he won’t talk trash or stab him in the back, then compliments his shoes…is Ben good??

Rose time: She mentions Zack W. and Brandon but the person who made her feel special and used his time wisely was Ben. The guys are not happy and Ben will sleep with one eye open.

The Last One-on-One: Bryden – The Iraqi War Vet
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ABC.com Bachelorette Bios

Desiree takes Bryden on a road trip. She loves road trips because they were too poor to fly when she grew up. She’s stoked to have Bryden on date (yes, she says stoked – like Brooks said earlier…interesting as it’s not a word commonly used) and they stop for snacks.

1st stop: El Matador Beach – it looks like beach from the Notebook when Allie says, “Say I’m a bird.” They play on the beach and just goof around. There’s a very child like vibe with Bryden…an innocence that you don’t see much. They feast on fish tacos before heading on. First thought with that was,”Guess they won’t be kissing soon.”

2nd stop: an Orange Grove, where they stop to pick some oranges and he confesses he doesn’t know what Brie is. (He’s not missing much in my opinion). They run through the groves and we move on.

3rd stop: Ojai Valley Inn and Spa – At this point some very familiar, romantic music plays…it’s a music cue…he’s sticking around. We should pay attention.

Des says she likes his funny and goofy side and how they’re like little kids when they’re together. He says you need that once in a while. Then, we get serious and he tells the story of his car accident in college that he had to be airlifted from. He brought pics and then talked about how it influenced his decision to join the military the next winter. He thinks you should enjoy every moment because you don’t know what’s gonna happen.

Des says the more she learns the more she wants to know and asks about his being ready for a relationship. He says he may have used the military as and excuse, but now he’s ready for something real.

He’s so sweet and he accepts the rose before they go to the pool. They do have chemistry. Des says there is something there and that he’s 100% such an amazing man. However, in the hot tub she obviously wants to be kissed and he’s clueless. She has to say “Just kiss me already.” To which he responds, “Just go for it?”

The pool and hot tub, the making out, the music…it’s all reminiscent of Sean and past successes so we can be assured Bryden will be around for quite a while.

At the Party:

While most of the guys are obsessed with the fact that Ben interrupted Michael G’s revelation to Des that he’s diabetic, Brian keeps his eye on the prize.
He says, “Can I steal you, sweetie?” He picks her up and takes her outside. The voiceover let’s us know he wants the rose badly and is not gonna leave anything on the table. They talk past relationships. His last ended a couple of months ago, but was probably over about 6 months ago. He says it was hard to break it off. This is obviously all a set up for the next show’s girlfriend drama.

At the Rose ceremony:

Keeps:
Ben, Bryden, Brooks, James, Kasey (who we don’t know yet), Dan(who we’ve seen nothing about!!!!), Juan Pablo, Brad (another…who???), Chris, Brian, Zack W., Drew, Mikey, Zak K., Michael G., and Brandon gets the final rose!

Sent Home: Nick M. who was a little shocked and feels rejected. Robert, who didn’t see it coming and Will who says, “Thanks Athena…”

My predictions: Still have high hopes for Chris, Brooks, and Bryden…she threw me for a loop by getting rid of Nick M. and I think Ben will stay around until at least final four. No new crushes for me tonight though.

Bachelorette Des: Episode One

Well, we’re off to another great start. First let me say that I loooove Des. She’s real, and funny, smart and unafraid to stand up for herself. She’s everything I wanted Emily to be. So, yeah – I’m excited.

I’m going to take a calculated risk here and offer what I saw on the guys she kept vs. the guys she sent home because come on, a guy in a suit of armor, a magician, and player that kept trying to take her to the fantasy suite – did anyone really think they were staying?

So, I tried to do a pre-ranking using the abc.com photos and profiles and was once again totally foiled. The photos of the guys never show what they really look like and you just can’t judge anyone until you’ve seen them next to Des.

Right off the bat, I knew I’d missed some good ones when half the guys in the opening segment weren’t on my list. Like Bryden, the Army guy that loves his dog and spent time in Iraq. He was adorable in person and she really liked his vibe. He walked away with a rose, but not the first rose of the evening.

The show repeated Sean’s trick from last season and gave Des the chance to pass a few out during the party. The first rose went to Ben, a relatively handsome dude who played the kid card in a way no one has before. He brought him in the limo. Now granted the kid was frigging adorable but I’m thinking this is a producer set up all the way. She’s definitely attracted to him but there’s something off that she’s not picking up on yet.

Another party rose went to Drew, who happened to be first out of the limo. She liked him right away and he talked about his “butterflies” that he hoped wouldn’t leave. I think it’s his eyes and his pretty smile that had her saying, mmm, mmm, mmm as he walked away.

Zak W. is a hard one to figure out. He came out of the limo shirtless and at one point stripped down to his undies to jump in the pool. He’s super smart and can actually be pretty good-looking at times but I can’t get a consistent read on whether he’s a geek or not. He’s definitely a nice guy though and I think I’m glad she kept him around.

Two other guys got roses at the party but we didn’t see hardly any of their conversations. That leads me to believe they could be sleepers and in it for the long haul. Michael G. who had her looking for the old penny she threw in the fountain seems nice but a little goofy. They showed him get a rose and get interrupted, but we only got a quick glimpse of the rose going to Nick M. He’s a pretty handsome fellow with some stunning blue eyes and a nice masculine aura. He wrote her a poem that he read out of the limo and it actually came off genuine. Des cries at the drop of a hat and you could see her eyes get a little shiny. I think she likes him a bit.

All of the other guys got their roses at the ceremony and it wasn’t really full of surprises. She kept The gorgeous Venezuelan, Juan Pablo, who played soccer with her and gave her chocolate – duh – no brainer. However, their language barrier will eventually get in the way. She also kept James from Chicago, who talked about loyalty and from the previews seems to be a part of some big drama in the house…he obviously loses.

Brandon from Maine is a cutie but maybe a tad too cheesy for her? He gave her his mother’s AA coin that he used to flip to flip to see whether he’d go to the interview for the show, and told her to give it back to his mom on their hometown. I like the kid but I’m betting he doesn’t get quite that far.

Other guys that she kept that were probably place fillers: Zack K. in his chucks, Will with his nicknames, and Brad with the bonehead wishbone move.

The guys we have left all have “could be” status. Brooks didn’t get a rose at the party despite some good conversations, but she obviously liked him and said his name at the rose ceremony in a way that made me go hmmm. Kasey seemed a little goofy at first but the more I watched him the more handsome he looked and he seems to have a brain as well. Robert – same as Kasey.

The final three guys to discuss all look really similar. Brian, who showed up in what looked to be a velour smoking jacket and jeans, Dan who was handsome yet pretty bland (although that could be an editing trick to throw us off), and Chris from Seattle who was one of my pre-show picks. Out of the three I just have a gut feeling that Chris will stick around awhile. He seems smart, genuine, cute. He’s non-threatening and serious and he just looks like they match up.

So: Episode One Predictions? I’m sure these will change by episode two but I’ll place a bet on her final four being:

Brooks, Chris, Bryden and Nick M….I’d throw Ben in there but it just feels like something has to be off with him. Happy Monday! See you next week. PS. If you leave comments make sure they aren’t spoilers. I’m going cold turkey this season…want to practice my matchmaking intuition.

Best Season Ever? Emily Picks Jef!

What a fantastic season.  I look back at how I thought Emily might be dull or fake and I’m so happy I was wrong.  In one of my first blogs regarding Emily’s season I said that I thought she had the potential to be the best Bachelorette ever. I’m not willing to put her above Trista Sutter at this point but I think she’s on equal ground.  I think this may be the first season since Trista and Ryan where I one hundred percent like both parts of the couple.  Oh, I’m sorry – in case you didn’t watch – Emily picked Jef!

The fact that I could just have easily put Arie’s name in that last sentence and felt the same way just goes to show that, finally, creator Mike Fleiss and his crew got it exactly right.  My only fear is that they will take the wrong lessons from their success.  Emily didn’t succeed because she was a beloved past contestant.  I hope they learned from Ben F. that you CANNOT rely on America’s love of the 2nd or 3rd place contestant to have a successful season.   Instead, you must focus on whether that person has real presence on camera and truly is looking for marriage and true love.

The night started with the family visits which were almost exactly the same for both men, with Emily’s family unable or unwilling to help her choose.  Jef was smooth and genuine and Arie babbled like a baby (adorable if not suave).  Emily’s family is strange.  Her mom reminded me of Arie’s mom, her dad was sweet but quiet.  Her brother came off a little scary psycho but chilled out a little the more he spoke with the guys.  Both guys asked for the blessing to propose and got it!

Emily didn’t think she was going to introduce anyone to Ricki but after talking with Jef on date day she decides she’ll take him.  The best part of watching this decision-making process was the discussion beforehand.  It seemed like she was really going to tell him he couldn’t come, but then we saw something rare that confirmed for me the coming success for Jef.  They had an actual conversation.  A real, back and forth, thoughtful conversation where they decided TOGETHER.  It was exactly the thing a real couple would do and the consideration they gave to each other and the points each was making told me that Arie was toast.

When Jef met Ricki, it was obvious they were going to be a family.  They all fit together so well.  I started to feel a little sorry for Emily that she had to spend the day with Arie, but in a Bachelorette first, she didn’t.

Probably the most painful awkward part of the evening came when Emily told Arie (after a deep discussion with Chris Harrison to figure out what to do – right!) that she wouldn’t be able to go on their date because she picked Jef.  However, she was woefully bad at explaining this and Arie just had to infer from her behavior, tears, and small comments that she had more confidence in Jef that he wasn’t the one.  I felt really bad for them both.

Fast forward to the proposal. Can Jef speak or what? That boy has a golden tongue and his words were romantic and confident.  He swayed Emily to say yes even after she was unsure she would actually get engaged again.  If we are to believe them both (and I only halfway do), she didn’t expect the proposal because they hadn’t talked about whether he would do it. Uhuh, right. But I have to say it brought tears to my eyes and I felt like I was watching something real.  When they brought Ricki out after it was obvious that this was a family.

As far as the live show with Chris Harrison? I think it was a bust.  I didn’t care for watching the show with the audience and his questions were dull.  Then we had to sit through a half hour with Arie, who we discovered flew to Charlotte unbeknownst to producers and left his journal from the experience for em to read.  He didn’t go see her out of respect for Jef and she didn’t read it out of respect for Jef.  I think everyone, including Arie realized after watching the show that Emily made the best choice for herself.

There was so little time to hear Emily and Jef.  We had to sit through them watching their own proposal scene again and Chris asking stupid questions like tell us how you feel about Emily.  Chris! I just sat through a whole season about how he felt about Emily! Tell us about wedding and baby plans. Apparently Jef is moving to Charlotte (Did anyone doubt Emily would come out victorious on that point?) and will have his own place until they get married.  Of course a couple who didn’t use the fantasy suite wouldn’t live together before marriage.  Emily says she’d like a spring wedding.

Another thing that disappointed from the live show was the lack of time with Ashley and JP.  They didn’t even get to come to the stage! Here you have a couple that is actually happy, living together and planning their wedding and you don’t give us an update? Arrrghh…at least we did get to see them and their spark is still there and real!

For those people looking to know who the next Bachelor is…rumors still say Roberto.  I’m OK with him but I’d rather have Arie.  I think Sean would end up being another Ben (not in the geeky way b/c Sean is awesome) because of his lack of conversational skills.  The lead in this series has to talk! If you go back and watch any of Sean’s dates he never brought up anything besides he’d be a good husband or dad, his faith, or his family.  Good man but despite how much America loves him now, the wrong choice for Bachelor. Arie on the other hand? Brilliant choice – better than Roberto – but doubt they can pull it off this fast after the word is out that they already signed Roberto.

What a great season! Looking forward to Bachelor Pad, Ed and Reid, and watching Chris B rebound with three different chics! Debauchery!

Bachelorette Emily: Finally! An Entertaining Men Tell All Episode

You know, I usually hate the Men/Women Tell All episodes of this franchise, but for some reason I loved this one from Emily’s season.  I think it has something to do with the fact that despite my initial belief they cast a bunch of ugly, boring guys (review blogs of first two episodes), I ended up with real feelings for these men.  Love (Sean, Wolf, Charlie…) or hate (Kalon!) I ended up caring and you can’t ask for more when it comes to reality TV.

The show started off with a nice montage of memorable moments and moments we didn’t see.  I agreed with the choice of Kalon’s baggage comment, Ryan’s don’t gain weight comment, and Doug’s uncomfortable first kiss! I cringed at seeing more of Travis and the egg and Emily spilling wine before she didn’t give Joe the rose on his date, but loved-loved-loved seeing Arie’s younger brothers spying on their kiss!

Seeing Ryan and Kalon reinforced all the beliefs I’d formed throughout the season.  I wondered if maybe they’d be better in person, but neither one seemed to be able to look back and see what was clear to the audience. Ryan wouldn’t take back his, “I would love you, but maybe not love on you” weight comment and Kalon couldn’t see why the guys had such a bad reaction to the helicopter entrance.  He would have found it “interesting”. Funniest moment had to be when Chris Harrison actually asked Ryan, “Is there a chance you just might be an arrogant ass?” His answer that he couldn’t be arrogant? PRICELESS and predictable.  He wanted to be the next Bachelor so bad he could taste it and was, I think, genuinely hurt when Chris spoke for ABC and said it’s not gonna happen! Ha!

Chris B. still loves Emily.  Poor guy.  It’s true what they say, he was a little immature – BUT I’d rather have an immature guy like him than a 35 year-old Doug, or a 30 year-old Ryan any day.  I think that the best thing to say about Chris is he was in it with his whole heart and truly believed in the process.  It sucked to see how much he still was hurting…hope he finds love on Bachelor Pad! If not he’d be a viable Bachelor option in a few years.  The ability to be that vulnerable and open to the experience is exactly what’s needed in a bachelor! I did a total turn around on Chris from the first show of the season.

The discussion with Sean was tough to watch.  He obviously still has strong feelings for her and truly believed she would be his wife.  It hurt to watch him ask, “What am I missing? Am I not bringing something to the table”? No one wants to feel inadequate but the sad truth about love is that sometimes you’re just not what the other person needs and there’s nothing you could do to make it so. He also admitted he’d never really had a broken heart and this is the first time he’s been broken up with! Aww…Sorry Sean but it had to happen someday! At least he said she showed him what he wanted and opened him up.

Everyone wanted to know why didn’t Sean make the final two? Well, I think people were watching with their hearts instead of hers! Emily said Sean is a great looking guy, a gentleman, confident without being cocky, and sensitive with a vulnerable side.  When you listen to what she said in the voiceovers it still seems like, “What? How did that happen?” But seriously, if you watch their interactions and the difference in her conversations with Jef and Arie, it’s crystal clear they didn’t connect on the same level.  Still, Sean said he did love her with “every ounce of his being.” Again, a great Bachelor quality. He was fully prepared to be a husband and father. Haven’t had a bachelor like that since Jason Mesnick! Emily admitted to ugly crying in her room when she watched Sean’s episode and I think that says a lot.  She really had feelings for the man – just not the feelings she had for Jef (hahaha she didn’t say that last part obviously).

Emily’s conversation with Kalon rocked! From the previews I thought I might feel a little bad for him but the boy showed no remorse and fed her more lines! She ended with, “I hope you find faith in something bigger than your Prada shoes and rented helicopters. You go girl!

Chris Harrison ended after bloopers by saying, “Normally I’d ask how things were going…” but he didn’t.  He said we’d all have to tune into watch.  PLEASE!  They are so trying to milk some drama out of this.  And truthfully, I ‘m not sure why.  The audience loves Jef an Arie.  We’re already psyched to see the end.  This all feels so contrived and unnecessary! UNLESS – and here’s an out on a limb wacko guess in case she doesn’t let either guy propose – we get a live proposal from Jef on Sunday night.  Slight, small, miniscule possibility that Jef won’t propose until she meets his parents, or something along those lines.  A live proposal would justify the first ever LIVE After the Final Rose.

Don’t forget the finale is SUNDAY!  Not Monday – Monday is Bachelor Pad and it looks like a sleazy, entertaining, cheesy festival of love, hate and lust.  So excited to see Reid and Ed from Jillian’s season together again!

Bachelorette Emily: Final Two and What’s to Come?

Last night was the first night I felt really bad for Emily.  Having to let one of those three guys go had to hurt.  Even though there was a statement to Chris that noted she knew who she wanted in the end and just had to get there. (It was quick – if you blinked you might have missed it.) If you’re looking for a clue as to who that guy might be, I’ll give you one you may have overlooked.  The whole show seemed to be about Emily dealing how hard it was going to be to send one guy home.  She was really worried about hurting feelings and dealing with the guilt of knowing they are all three in love with her.  When she talked about what a good guy Sean was in the beginning she teared up.  When she talked about Arie in the end, she teared up.  No tears for Jef.

No tears for Jef actually means the exact opposite from what you might think.  No tears for Jef means no guilt about Jef.  She doesn’t have to worry about hurting his feelings because she knows she’s going to pick him. And, as much as I like Arie and agree that he’s hot, I just can’t deny that Jef and Emily have a deeper connection.  When she mentioned she saw him while she was making breakfast? When she said she wanted to turn him down with the fantasy suite and he beat her to it?  All more signs.

When Emily told Arie she didn’t know what he did on a Tuesday morning I was thinking about how she wouldn’t know what he was doing on most of his mornings if he married her because he would be traveling.  I know the producers and editors cut the scenes to make it seem like she was great with their conversation but if you dvr’d it, go back and watch her face as she listens to him.  There are moments of realization that hit her where you can see her thinking, “but that’s not us” (her and Ricki).

I felt horrible for Sean when he was sent home but that exchange on the bench was a perfect example of why he was sent packing.  They sat there not knowing what to say.  They sat on there date not knowing what to say.  In scenes with Jef and Aries you can hear them whisper and talk as they walk before the edit in the actual conversation.  With Sean there was so much dead air.  I get that he was probably extremely uncomfortable revealing love on camera.  feel sorry if that in any way influenced how she felt.  Still, I don’t think there was anything he could have done.  She’s head over heels for Jef and 100% physically attached to Arie.

Next week is the Men Tell All.  While I will enjoy getting the chance to hear from Sean and some of the other guys, I can’t say I’m that interested.  I don’t really want to see Ryan, Kalon, Doug or any of the others again.  All season it’s been Jef, Arie, Sean and Emily and that’s what I want to watch. The following week we get meet the families, the proposal and a LIVE After the Final Rose all in the same night.  Previews do what they always do…try to get us to believe that maybe she doesn’t pick anyone.  They show her crying and her family making crazy statements.  Trust me, they would never have edited Emily’s love story the way they did this season if she wasn’t getting engaged in the end and I’d put all my money on Jef at this point. (5% of me that thinks I might lose that money…great season!)

Jef, Arie, or Sean – Who will get the final rose + thoughts on hometowns!

If it was that hard for Emily to get rid of Chris last night, I don’t know how the lady will make it through this final three.  There can be cases made for each one of the men to receive the final rose…and I’ve already made most of them.  After the hometown dates I thought maybe Jef and Sean had a slight edge because I didn’t think Emily could see Ricki in Arie’s life as well as she could at Sean’s family home and Jef’s family ranch, but who knows? The chemistry between Arie and Emily is definitely off the charts.

I’m not going to even say much about Chris’ hometown date in Chicago because it was obviously the least eventful of the four, BUT I have to give it to the producers, editors, and to Em as an actress, they almost had me thinking maybe she would go for him.  I think it was a little out of line for her to tell Chris’ dad she was falling in love with Chris.  She had to have known at that point that the other three men had a stronger hold on her heart.  Maybe Chris’ sister telling her to let him go if he wasn’t the one sunk in too late and she was just caught up in the excitement of his loving family, but I think, unfortunately, that her statement was more of a calculated move by the show to keep us guessing. Yuck.

Jef’s date in Utah couldn’t have been better.  Who would have guessed he had “a little country in him” as Emily said.  It was fun to watch them shoot and she seemed to really connect with his sisters.  I have to admit when they left the family gathering, I thought, “That’s it?” Cut to the scene of them on the picnic blanket and him reading her the letter…heart melt.  It was so different from the last letter Emily had read aloud to her on the show ( Ryan Bowers!).  It’s obvious that Jef has fallen head over heels for Emily and, I think, from the way she looks at him with goo goo eyes – she’s fallen for him as well. However, once again, we are watching a show and you will have noticed that she didn’t tell his family she was actually falling in love with him. (Calculation and acting – no!)

Saving Sean and Arie for last totally sets the viewer up to think they will be the final two.  The fact that she told Arie she had missed him and she called Sean “honey” were just two of the little clues being dropped that, hey – these two are sure things.  The show is totally setting us up for the ouster of one of the big guys next week.  I can’t even begin to guess which one it might be…unless I look at Emily’s behavior with Sean’s family which on the surface seemed really cool.

When Emily was with Arie’s family there was a moment of tension with his mom but then we saw their one on one conversation and it was clear that they liked one another.  With Sean’s family we had the practical joke about him still living at home (and if you watched the credits – the armadillo for dinner).  With both of the jokes, Emily’s smile never reached her eyes.  She seemed uncomfortable and a little out of place.  The other clue we got was the absolute overuse of the term perfect with Sean.  Everything about Sean is “perfect”.  In the Bachelorette that usually signifies an upcoming issue or problem.  True, he ran after her for one last kiss and he’s romantic, but if you watch the way she kisses all three of them he’s the one that she looks the least comfortable with.

To close, I will say that if you contrast the way Emily used the word perfect with Sean to the way she used it with Jef, her tone of voice says it all.  My prediction after hometowns: Jef is final two – probably endgame – but I still have no clue about Sean and Arie.  Leaning towards Arie.  What do you guys think?

Bachelorette: No recap, just thoughts and predictions…

I’d have to be living in a hole to not have heard the rumors that Arie, Jef, and Sean are Emily’s top three guys in the best installment of The Bachelorette since Trista Sutter’s season.  Knowing this takes a little of the edge off the upcoming hometown dates next Monday.  It’s pretty pbvious from the episode last night that Chris B. is her fourth the out of the four.  I have to say that for the first time in a long time, I have no clue who she picks and I’m excited about it.  I think it’s because out of Arie, Jef, or Sean, I think she’s found love. Still, if I had to hazard a guess? My gut after last night is leaning towards Jef.

Sure, the chemistry with Arie and Sean, who both snuck out to see her, has been off the charts as far as TV chemistry, but the chemistry between her and Jef on that library floor? It wasn’t just physical.  It was the shared dreams type chemistry.  Emily has been burned before by Brad and this time I think she’s going for his exact opposite.  Jef is an intelligent, self-aware, respectful man who wants a life just like the one Emily’s envisioning.  The one caveat with Jef? His Mormon family.  They haven’t said it out loud yet as far as I know, but you have to think religion will somehow come into the discussion when Emily goes to meet them! One more thing…will she uproot to start a life with him? I’ve read he’s in L.A. which makes it much more likely than Salt Lake.

As far as Sean goes, I LOVE him.  He’s strong, adorable, smart, and seems to have compatible goals with Emily but I haven’t heard any discussions yet about who Sean really is? I feel like we don’t even know the guy.  BUT, she seems very into his kisses and he seems pretty sure of his place in her heart.  Wonder what they haven’t been showing us?

Arie is the odds on favorite right? But I think in the long run Arie and Emily only have chemistry. I know she was fishing for him to tell her about the producer but that conversation at the lunch table was so strained and forced.  Have they ever really talked about life together? Every time they say something he leans over and kisses her.  He may be an awesome kisser and a beautiful man but I think she’s looking for a situation to jump right into.  When Jef told her he wanted babies yesterday I think it sealed the deal.

We’ll see what hometowns hold and who the final two end up being.  Right now I would say Jef and Arie but that’s the beauty of being so into a season and not knowing what’s going to happen! You can totally enjoy it!

***Random thoughts:

I thought it was time for Doug to go.  Great guy but as he said, his girl radar is way off.

I thought the way they handled the producer situation was cheesy and anti-climactic BUT mature.

Nice cheesy writing last night:” sitting on top of the world” with Arie as they were on top of the boat, “need to go deep” with John as they descend into a dungeon.

You KNOW the lock they gave John to use was one with issues.  Total set up.

If John would have opened up sooner and was more comfy on camera he’d be a great Bachelor.

Bye Bye Ryan! Hello Final …Six?

Last night’s Bachelorette episode in Croatia was a feast of beautiful scenery, but if Ryan was to be believed, the only scenery worth looking at was Emily.  Thank God she finally came to her senses and sent the pro football player packing! After the most uncomfortable “post rose” conversation I’ve ever sat through, he walked out, ego intact, sure she was making a mistake.  It’ll be interesting to see if he has the media savvy needed for redemption on the upcoming “Men Tell All” episode.  Perhaps if he took a lesson from Humble Doug he would have a shot at being the Bachelor, NOT.

His parting words about hoping the editors “cut” things so people would see who he really is and that he wouldn’t come off as an “an arrogant ass” were priceless. Almost as good as the scenes of the boys (I have a hard time calling them men.) sitting back in the room talking about how he’s just that! I almost felt bad when he mentioned that he had made good friends with them, knowing that he would have to hear what they were saying while he was gone, but then again, if Ryan really is going to be a better person like he says he wants to be, he needs a huge reality check.

Chris had a good night getting the rose and the “Bravery Cup” after seeing Disney’s new movie and competing in the Highland games. I just have to take a moment to thank the producers for the kilts and sleeveless shirts.  Who would have thought that six men in skirts would look that hot. If the award had been given to the traditional winner it would have no doubt been Sean, but Emily went for her own definition of bravery and gave it to Chris.  We did get a moment where Em reassured Sean of his place in her heart.  Even though, and perhaps because, we didn’t see much of him in last night’s episode, there’s no doubt that man is final two stuff.

Earlier in the show Emily let Travis go on his one on one date.  Not much to say about it.  Travis was really sweet and he was obviously a great friend but there was no chemistry and she didn’t have trouble being honest with him.  It was the first time this season I’ve really felt sorry for a contestant.  Listening to him talking about how he has “such a big heart” and was so ready for love again made him sound like the perfect next Bachelor. Unfortunately, he just doesn’t cut it in the looks department.  Why can’t we mix Travis’ personality with Ryan’s looks? Oh wait, that was Jason Mesnick. Too late.

Another guy that almost got the boot but was saved at party, if we believe things happen the way we see them, was John. Such a handsome guy, but what does Emily know about him? Not a lot. He saved himself by pulling his grandparents funeral cards out of his wallet and confessing that his parents didn’t even know he carried them.  It was sweet and cool that he was finally opening up but does anyone think it’ll get him more than a week?  Ditto Doug, he made a small move on Emily but it’s too late – he’s eating the front-runner dust.

Speaking of front-runners, the producers are giving us a good rotation of Arie, Sean, and Jef.   Hmmm….final three anyone?  Of course.  In last night’s episode Arie made the season’s obligatory sneak out visit to tell Emily how happy he was she sent Ryan home. Their chemistry is off the charts and she gave him the rose she didn’t give Ryan. It seems like that would seal the deal, right?

BUT oh, no! He dated a producer? Now we are supposed to question everything? Manipulation, manipulation, manipulation. For those people who watched the previews, we know that it’s revealed that Arie dated a producer from the show and Emily will find out next episode! Knowing that Arie has had a relationship with a producer all along should make us question every move he’s made. So, he just happened to decide on his own to visit her.  He just happened to find her apartment in Croatia.  She just happened to have the rose from Ryan lying on her bedside table?  Total set up scene – question is – do we care? I’m not sure we do.  He’s such a hottie and their attraction is obviously real, so it’s easy enough to overlook.

This has been a great season so far!  The editing tonight with making us wait to see what would happen with Ryan and then on the last two roses (I almost believed she was letting them both go.) was awesome.  I’m feeling really positive about Emily and the men that are left! What about you?

The Contenders…Bachelorette Episode Four

I think it’s time to discuss the contenders.  After last night’s episode it’s pretty clear where Emily’s heart is headed.  There are two guys that seem to have made the biggest impression on our girl! Arie Luendyk looks to have a lock on Emily’s attention and affection so far.  Sean Lowe is close behind in an understated yet sincere performance, and Jef Holm seems to be making strides despite his goofy socks (shin guards?) and missed opportunities.

I didn’t want to fall for Arie.  He seems like such a set up from the producers…a race car driver like her former love? As the season progresses though, I can’t help but find myself being sucked in by his earnest focus on her instead of the process.  When he’s talking to her it’s obvious he’s into her and really wants to get to know her better.  He touches her spontaneously as opposed to strategically (Hello Ryan’s arm around her whenever she’s within 2 feet!).  She ‘s at ease with him in a way that makes it appear she may have already made a choice.  She told him when she’s alone on the porch he’s the one she thinks of? Couple that with her comment about how guys like him are hard to find? He’s an odds on favorite to be her intended.

However, none of the above means that Sean Lowe is out of the running.  Sean didn’t grab my attention at first because I’ve personally never had a thing for blondes, BUT he is steadily climbing in the “could be her true love” dept.  Emily wants to be taken care of, not managed and dominated as would be the case with Ryan, but loved and looked after.  Sean has the handsome, compassionate, protector vibe down.  And, he’s the only one she’s been kissing with the same honesty as Arie.  It’s hard to tell where this is going because the producers can edit it so many ways.  Arie could lose out to Sean, Sean could lose out to Arie…but I’d bet money that it’ll be one of the two.

Jef Holm is an enigma to me.  We haven’t seen very much of him and he’s definitely got an oddball side.  I thought they might be giving him the Jessie Csincsak edit.  I can’t figure out if he knows she’s into him and is playing hard to get to keep her attention, or if he’s really that dim and passed up beach kisses by accident.  Obviously from Emily’s conversation with Chris Harrison, she likes him and I think next week’s one on one (in the previews) should clear this up for viewers.

You’ll probably note that I didn’t add Doug Clerget and Chris Bukowski to the mix.  I just can’t see her falling for either in the long run (especially after watching Chris dance in the closing credits).  Add to that the producer’s focus on their conflict and it equals no future with Emily for either of them. I did agree with Chris that there’s something fake about Doug’s humble man act.  The more I see of him the less I like him.  Reverse that for Chris even though I don’t think he’ll make it to the finals.

Last but not leas,t let me say that this season’s hidden “Wes” is Ryan.  I said from their first date that something was off and he didn’t seem to be there for her.  Well, from last night’s show it’s clear that he’s there to try to be the next Bachelor.  Good luck with that.  Chauvinistic (trophy wife?), egotistical (how are you worthy?) players tend not to win America’s heart.  Emily seems to be catching on but the previews looked like Ryan’s not leaving yet and that they end up making out. Gross.

I’m hanging in there because I seriously think we’ll have a successful match from this season in the long run! Despite the slow start I’m getting into the guys and like her more than I ever thought possible. I love the disbelief that shows on her face when Ryan or Kalon make stupid comments and I can’t wait for her to tell Kalon to “get the _____ out” next week. From the previews the producers will give us lots of drama, but for the first time in a while it’s not drama created to hide the fact that there wasn’t a love connection. I think Emily’s engaged and happy.  Arie or Sean – that’s my bet.

Bachelorette Emily’s Lost Charisma…Found! (best episode yet!)

Dare we hope that Emily has found her charisma? The question floated through my mind as they played the teasers for the evening and I found myself getting excited.  After watching the first two episodes, I had almost given up on Emily.  Where was the sparkly, flirty, entertaining woman that we caught glimpses of with Brad? Turns out she might have had a little stage fright/insecurity to deal with, or maybe she just felt overwhelmed when surrounded by the larger group of men, but whatever it was – last night she found her chutzpah!

I haven’t really been a Chris fan since I viewed his pic on ABC.com, but I’m willing to say I was wrong about him.  His date was the first time this season that I actually felt excited for Emily.  Sure he’s a little competitive, young, and he seems to be seriously underestimating what she may have going on with other guys (has he watched the show?), but she sparkles when she’s with him and their first kiss was undeniably romantic. He seems sincere and for the most part sweet, although I could have done without his comment on how unbelievable she looked in a harness! (Ick!)

When Emily lets it slip she’s been thinking about someone since the beginning, I tend to believe that’s her voice and not the producers.  It’s obvious he’s on her list of potentials. There date was a pretty cute set up, but you can’t convince me they couldn’t have checked the weather forecast – scaling the building with a threatening thunderstorm seemed an unnecessary risk. The Charlotte people running into the dance floor after their kiss was a little contrived as well, but cute.  Overall, this date brought me back into the process! Hooray!

The group date was one of the best ever, in my opinion.  Never has a Bachelorette had the chance to get so much scoop on her men before.  Emily’s friends preformed to the best of their ability, not shirking the harder responsibilities like viewing the push up performances or the pectoral magnificence of various men.  If you hung around to watch the credits you caught a glimpse of the reasoning behind Emily’s party time conversation with Alessandro, too.  Would she have kept him by mistake had her friends not been looking out? Maybe!

The group date also gave us the chance to get to know Sean and Ryan better.  With Sean, well, let’s face it – is anyone not head over heels for this guy yet?  He’s handsome, sincere, wants to be a husband and father and talked about family and faith.  He seems like he could be her perfect match! With Ryan – wow – the warning signs that cropped up last week made a full-on appearance tonight.  Could a guy be any denser than to say he wouldn’t be “loving on” Emily if she gained weight?  And to say it in front of her friends? Loser! His behavior at the party before the rose ceremony was like that of  a snotty toddler.  Seriously, I know he may have been sincerely jealous when he saw her kissing Arie, but it’s what he signed up for and Arie’s a race car driver not a ballerina! He called him girly! His face as he lifted his glass for a toast spoke volumes.  She’s picking up on it, too – so it’ll soon be sayonara Ryan!

Emily’s last one-on-one date with Arie showed why he’ll be around until, my guess, the end.  Not sure about the very end but probably top four, at least.  Her actual words after her date with the daring driver, “Guys like Arie are really hard to find.  I feel like I finally found him and I don’t want to screw it up.” My only concern with Arie is that Emily has a bit of a transference issue going on.  First she transferred all her excitement and idol worship of Dolly Parton in to the experience of the date, then she transferred her feelings about little Ricki’s daddy to Arie.  She said he reminds her so much of him – good for Arie, maybe not so psychologically good for Emily finding true love.  She’ll have to get past the image she’s imposing on him to see the real him.

My favorite moment and line of the night had to be when Kalon reprimanded her for interrupting him. In reference to his rudeness she stated, “I do like tall, skinny, and funny but I don’t like tall, skinny, and condescending.” It was at that moment I fell in love with her.  I just wish the producers would have let her kick his skinny butt off the show like you know she wanted to! Sadly, it was Kalon’s nemesis, Stevie, that took the walk out alone since she had already sent Tony and Alessandro packing!

Three moments to keep in mind for future shows: Sean and Emily’s first kiss at the rose ceremony party (oh my goodness!), Arie and Emily’s make out session at the rose ceremony party (oh my goodness gracious!), and Jef’s confession of his crush on her – courtesy of her friend’s advice.  We only caught a glimpse but it was apparent in that moment that her friend’s dug him.  They gave him the edit they gave Sean last week and look what that got Sean this week…I’m just sayin’.

Looking forward to next week’s show – Golly, I’m so happy to be able to say that!

On Second Look…The Men Tell All

The” Men Tell All” special is generally hands down a better show than “Women Tell All”.  The men lay it all out fairly and honestly while the women get caught up in the cattiness.  The men are able to understand that they just weren’t the one, while the women keep pining away thinking of they’d only had more time.  While both men and women tend to gang up on one or two people who may (William) or may not (Ryan P.) have deserved it, only with the men do you notice guys who you never noticed during the season due to editing shine when given the chance to speak and interact with others.

I’m sure many people will disagree with me, but watching William’s montage and his interview only served to heighten my sense that the guy is indeed, in his own words, a jackass.  He may have been trying to feel sorry, or trying to appear the nice guy, but it was obvious to everyone that he threw Ben C. under the bus and that his roast of Ashley was based in his own truth.  Ultimately, I think he’s just a little immature, but there’s also a bit of a hidden manipulator with low self-esteem hiding inside.

Alternatively, Ryan P. is a decent and genuine guy who sincerely hoped for a relationship with Ashley.  The guys mercilessly made fun of him on the show and in person on “Men Tell All”.  Seems to me that a lot of what bothered some of the guys about Ryan was their own discomfort with his feminine side.  Ryan, like Jason Mesnick before him, has a true wholeness about him.  He’s able to be open with his emotions and is always optimistic.  When he admitted he read the books filled with questions  the guys snickered and laughed, but given the choice, I’d want the man who took the process seriously enough to prepare.  Blake seemed to be the one giving it to him the hardest and I have to say, having watched Blake’s reaction to the Bentley revelation, Ryan is the more mature and better man by far.  There’s a reason they picked Blake to be on the Bachelor Pad with the likes of Kasey, Rated R, Graham Bunn, and Jake Pavelka.

My final thoughts on the “Men Tell All” episode have to do with the guys that shine.  The ones you think, if only she’d seen you this comfortable you could’ve been a contender.  This is unique to the guys show.  Very rarely is there a woman that you think, “Oh, he should’ve kept her.” Tonight’s winner was obviously Nick.  Well spoken, compassionate, and fair, he went after the jerks of the group bringing objective and common sense questions to the table.  I love it when a guy can defend his peers when everyone else is attacking.  Highly evolved men like that are one in a million and definitely the kind of man I’d want to date.

In the end, I can’t wait for tomorrow night’s show.  I am a firm believer that Ashley is right this minute in love and engaged to one J.P. Rosenbaum.  I hope they will be a couple that will follow in the footsteps of Trista and Ryan, Andrew and Jen (even though they didn’t make it long-term – I think it was real.) Jason and Molly, and Ally and Roberto.  My only concern still centers on Ashley herself.  Can she love herself enough to let someone else truly love her? The fact that J.P. is older and wiser gives them a chance…Good luck to them.  Or to her and Ben, if I’ve missed the boat on what true love looks like.

Bachelorette Ashley Has Baby Squirrel Syndrome

This morning driving to work a baby squirrel barreled towards the road in front of me. I stepped on my breaks and as I did, the squirrel turned and ran back towards safety. Then suddenly, he turned and ran straight for the road again. Thank goodness I stopped in time. There have been times in my life where I’ve suffered from baby squirrel syndrome. I’ve psyched myself up to try something and began running straight for the goal, only to turn around at the first sign of danger. Had I stopped there, I might have been considered mature, or conversely a coward, but things would never have degenerated into road kill. The mistake of the baby squirrel was in suddenly reversing and running headlong into danger. It was as if he became confused in his fear and over reacted in a way that could have cost him his little life.

The Bachelorette’s Ashley Hebert seems to be suffering from baby squirrel syndrome this season as well, first with Bentley, then with her decision to tell the others about the Bentley saga. In the beginning Ashley knew Bentley was trouble. She’d been told so by Michelle Money through texts before the show. I can see where maybe she wouldn’t have listened; she and Michelle weren’t the best of friends in their fight for Brad. But she ran towards the road anyway and it seemed like she had made the turn for an episode or two when Bentley left and we saw some decent progress with her, JP, and Ben!

Ultimately though, baby squirrel syndrome took over and she became confused and fearful running right back into the road. It was painful to watch how hopeful she was when she was told Bentley was in the hotel. For those of us who have been manipulated by guys as suave and snake-like as Bentley it was like watching a cat play with a mouse and we knew that the mouse would lose. No doubt about it, even with her assertive “*&#@ you” after their meeting, as an audience we knew she had tire tracks all over her.

The one thing she had going for her at this point was the fact that none of the guys was aware of her recent confusion and immaturity. She seemed lighter, more sure of herself, and really ready to move on and give the guys a chance. Cue repeat of the syndrome. Now, there are arguments that can be made for telling J.P. the truth. If her feelings are as strong for him as she said, full disclosure and honesty is important. But she could also have waited until they were stronger as a couple or even engaged to say, “Hey – you might not like the first few weeks of the show.” She was lucky that the driver on the road – J.P. – was compassionate and understanding, and probably already in love with her.

I have to think that J.P. probably felt a lot like I did watching the squirrel run right back into the road when he heard her telling the other guys. She’d already been luckier than she deserved in his reaction and then she decides to lay it all out there for everyone else? Poor Mickey and Blake accidentally over-corrected and hit her hard, while Constantine and Lucas just seemed to step on the gas. (Side note here: the whole scene was a tribute to the fragility of the male ego…even J.P. had to get in on the action and rub it into the other guys that she told him first.)

I really hope that with all of this behind her she can be cured of her ailment and develop a decent relationship with one of the deserving guys left, but the previews don’t bode well. The producers are either trying to entice us to keep watching with drama because the rest of the season is dull due to her obvious love for J.P. or Ben, or it really was a train wreck and they have no choice in the matter. I still don’t want to give up hope. As sick as she is, I’d like her to find love.

Why I still watch The Bachelorette…

Another season of the Bachelorette is upon us, so I thought I would reflect on my relationship with the franchise in general.  I have to admit I didn’t watch season one or two of The Bachelor.  At that point in time you couldn’t have paid watch reality TV.  Without anything to base my opinion on, I deemed it misogynistic and exploitative, not to mention fake.  After all, who could really fall in love on a show like that?  How could the process of quick elimination work when we all know how hard dating and finding that special someone can be?  Then came the Bachelorette and Trista.  When told from the point of view of a woman, the same process seemed to make much more sense.

After all, a woman who goes on a show entitled The Bachelorette probably really wants to get married.  I don’t think that’s the case for most of the Bachelors, as evidenced by their final rose relationship track record.  A bachelor goes on the show and is exposed to 25 women who fight over him and all of a sudden he thinks, “If these 25 women all want me, how many more women are out there that would want me, too?”  Ego takes over and even if he really did think he might want to get married in the beginning, the seeds of doubt have been planted.  The exception to this has been Jason, who from the very start of the show was obviously genuine in the fact he was ready and looking for a wife – so much so that he braved scores of angry women and the media to follow his heart and dump Melissa for Molly.

The process used in the Bachelor/Bachelorette isn’t really new.  It’s not that different from the process used in historical romance novels depicting England’s “Ton” and the courting process.  People would meet at a ball, the gentlemen would decide who they were interested in and would then “call” on their choices.  The women would then pick (with the help of their fathers, brothers, or uncles– perhaps the Chris Harrison role?) from their suitors.  The suitors may have visited for tea and cakes or perhaps walked with them in the park, but it wasn’t like they dated for months trying to figure out if that person was the one.  With today’s all time high divorce rate for people who “know each other” and live together before marriage, it doesn’t seem like it’s a worse way to do things.

So when Trista fell in love with Ryan and we got to watch them get married, and have babies, it was proof enough to me that there was  a chance that the show could really work.  I sat through seasons like Jake and Vienna in order to catch glimpse of real romance like Trista and Ryan, Jason and Molly, Allie and Roberto, even Andrew and Jen (who didn’t work out – but were no question in love).  I guess you could say that my relationship with the Bachelor/Bachelorette franchise is like that of a woman who has married a reformed player.  I stay committed because I believe that there’s something real there, but I never let down my guard because I can still always get played.

I’m hoping that this season with Ashley no one gets played and there’s a couple who walks away 100% in love.  If the producers (who I know make half the choices anyway)don’t manipulate the season with the “Bentley” storyline or create unnecessary tension with surprise revelations, I think Ash might have a shot.  My money’s on J.P. and “Cupcake”.